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Taming the Tongue: Why It’s So Important For Christian Teens

Christians talk about taming the tongue as if it were a rattlesnake that needs special treatment, given its deadly nature. But what exactly does it mean to tame your tongue, and why is it so important? You believe in Jesus as your savior, you go to church, you’re saving sex for marriage.

What’s one little swear word now and then?

Think about someone you know who always seems to have bad breath. Maybe it’s a hygiene issue or, in some cases, the sign of an underlying medical condition. But no matter. You know who he or she is, and you’re very careful to stay out of his or her personal space. And if by chance that person crosses into your personal space, you know it right away.

What if you are that person?

Hi, I’m Lauren Thell, author of Christian YA fiction and blogger for teens who are ready to exceed the world’s expectations.

Directly From the Mouth

The mouth is a fountain, and others remember you by what comes out of it. I’m not just talking about stink. Because just as you always remember a person with chronically malodorous breath, you also always remember a person whose talk is chronically dirty and hateful. 

Are you that person? Do you call yourself a Christian, then use profane words when you slam your finger in your locker?

Are you someone who sings “Oh Lord, my God” in your favorite hymn at church on Sunday, only to exclaim “Oh my God!” when your friend gives you exciting news on Monday?

Do you preach the verses about loving your neighbor as yourself, then go and talk about that neighbor behind his back?

Do little white lies roll off your tongue faster than drool off a Saint Bernard?

Are you someone everyone dubs as “opinionated”—and proud of it?

If so, it’s time to tame your tongue. Because taming the tongue is about more than cleaning up your language.

The Speech of Jesus’ Followers

Lots of people call themselves Christian, but you would never know it by their speech. I know Christians who use foul language like it’s their own personal dialect or who love to gossip for hours on the phone. I’ve seen Christians spout off their prejudices against the people they’re supposed to be witnessing to. I’ve been that kind of Christian myself, and you probably have, too. 

Is that how Jesus spoke?

Taming the Tongue to Speak Like Jesus

Let’s face it: We are imperfect sinners. Only Jesus has ever been perfect in every area, including speech, and thanks be to God he took our place on the cross because the rest of us would never be able to come down if it had been us. Our slates are wiped clean, our dirty clothes have been replaced with pure white silks.

So why does it matter how we speak? James says it best: “Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.”  (James 1:26) 

Is he accusing us of being fake Christians? That’s a scary thought.

In this verse, Luke tells us we speak from our hearts whether intentionally or not. You can wear a Got Jesus? t-shirt and put a bumper sticker with a cute little fish symbol on your car, but if you can’t control your speech, you need to examine your heart.

If you consider yourself one of God’s people, you need to follow the conduct of the club, and words are where it starts. You can put out a facade of community service or be the worship leader for your church’s services, but you can’t cover up your sinful words. 

Proverbs From a Very Wise Man

Still doubt the importance of words in showing your faith? Consider the Proverbs of Solomon (chapters 10-22 and 25-29 of the book of Proverbs). I did a quick count of every verse in these 14 chapters that pertained to speech (verses with the words lips, mouth, tongue, or speech) and came up with 66.

That’s right, at least 66 of King Solomon’s proverbs advise us about the importance of taming the tongue!

Consider a few of them:

Proverbs 10:11
Proverbs 16:24
Proverbs 10:19 (1984 NIV)

Have you ever considered that your tongue may be doing most of your sinning?

When we talk about sin, the first things that come to mind are usually something along the lines of sexual immorality, murder, hatred, stealing, or cheating. But have you ever considered that your tongue may be doing most of your sinning? Most of us are not murderers, bank robbers, or swindlers, and many of us strive for sexual purity. But, with few exceptions, we all have tongues and tongues have a way of getting out of control the more they are used. (If you are a member of the deaf community, I don’t intend to leave you out. Speech is just as potent with the hands as it is with the tongue!)

For Further Study

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Now that you know why you must tame your tongue, you can find practical rules on exactly how to do that in my next post: How to Control Your Speech: 5 Important Rules.

I challenge you to pick up your Bible and check out the multitude of Proverbs that warn us about the importance of controlling your speech. And if you struggle to control your speech the most when you’re angry: How to Control Your Anger So Others Can’t Control You.