As a kid, you sat through Sunday church services because your parents made you. Your mom wouldn’t let you put your feet off the pew in front of you and your dad kept scolding you for not holding your hymnal up. Fast forward a few years and now you’re a teenager, staring at the preacher with glazed eyes and thinking, “I can’t wait until I’m older. Then no one can make me go to church.”
Then you graduate high school, move out of the house, and into a college dorm where, lo and behold, nobody’s analyzing your every move or dragging you out of bed on Sunday mornings. Yippee!
Now what?
You have essentially entered this new and exciting world of adulthood. You are now independent and responsible for your own choices. You can do whatever you want.
And that means it’s time to take responsibility for your faith.
Hi, I’m Lauren Thell, author of Christian YA fiction and blogger for teens who are ready to exceed the world’s expectations.
In This Article
Choose For Yourself Which Road You’ll Take
The transition to adulthood is a critical crossroads. It’s the time when you must either take responsibility for your faith or abandon it altogether. You will either look at church and Christianity and say there’s nothing there, and none of this means anything, or it’s deeply true, and that changes everything.
Many will decide there’s “nothing there” and forgo accountability to a higher power in exchange for a life lived entirely in service to self. They view this path as the way to freedom from what they otherwise consider oppression to self-autonomy.
But odds are if you’re on this site—whether because you came here directly or ended up here through a search—you’re not ready to walk away from the notion that “it’s deeply true.” And I commend you for making that hard choice, the first of many hard choices.
Do NOT Follow Your Heart—Unless It’s Aligned With Christ
This is counter-cultural advice at its greatest. Everywhere you go, people will tell you to follow your heart, live your dreams, and throw caution into the wind. But God gives us a stark warning about the heart in Jeremiah 17:9:
“The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure.”
Ask the girl whose heart was shattered by a boy she was certain loved her. Or the now jobless intern who pursued a fad career that went belly-up. How about the boy now sitting in jail after acting on his desire to gain? They all followed their hearts at some point, and look where it got them.
Steve Jobs, cofounder of tech company Apple Inc., almost had it right when he said, “Follow your heart, but check it with your head.” But true wisdom says, “Follow your heart, but check it with God’s word constantly.”
It’s Jesus you want to worship and adore, not your heart. Because, unlike the heart, Jesus won’t lead you astray. Put him at the center of your focus and let your dreams fill in around him.
Related: What Does it Mean to Surrender Your Dreams to God?
To Church or Not To Church?
Not gonna lie, when you’re in college (or working your first full-time, backbreaking job), sleeping in on the weekend is a luxury right up there with a homecooked meal and having someone else do your laundry. The last thing you want is to change out of your comfy lounge clothes and make yourself presentable to the public. And who’s gonna know? Mom and Dad aren’t there to make sure you’re at nine a.m. worship, so why not take it easy? You could always listen to Christian radio later.
This is probably the most critical mistake many young adults make: quitting church. Which is why choosing to continue participation in regular worship is one of the first ways young adults can own their faith. Your faith needs the rejuvenation of worship with other Christians. If you let this go, it won’t be long before your faith crumbles.
Decide today that you will worship the Lord, even when no one is there to make you go to church on Sunday.
Related: Why Young Christians Absolutely Need to Go to Church.
To Party or Not to Party?
Ever look at the adults in your life and think, “Man, I can’t wait until I’m old enough to [fill in the blank]”? What is it you think you’ve been missing out on? Smoking? Legal consumption of alcohol? Using cuss words freely? Going to the casino and dropping a hundred bucks on a game of Blackjack? Watching R-rated movies? Sex?
That isn’t adulthood. That’s “adultolescence,” where you’re just a bigger kid engaging in riskier behaviors. The truth is, some things are just as sinful for adults as they are for kids. God instructs us to use language that edifies, not gratifies, no matter what age you are (Ephesians 4:29). Some media (movies, websites, magazines, novels, etc.) isn’t fit for consumption at any time in your life (Psalm 101:3). Sex is still reserved for marriage, whether you’re eighteen or fifty-seven (Hebrews 13:4). And you might want think twice about whether other “adult” activities are worth the problems they bring (Galatians 5:16).
As you transition to adulthood, hold yourself accountable to Christian standards, even when your parents aren’t there to do it for you.
Service to God or Service to Self?
Ultimately, you’ve reached the point where you now have to decide which “god” you’ll serve: the God of all creation or yourself? I hope you’ll make it your goal to serve Christ in all you do, whether in class at a university, having lunch with your coworkers, hanging out with your friends at a dorm party, or sitting alone in front of your computer.
Your life has meaning beyond what you can see right now. But even those fully devoted to serving God with their lives sometimes struggle with knowing exactly how to go about doing that.
Just Pick Something And Do It!
Am I doing what God wants me to do?
This is the ultimate hangup for Christian young adults (and old ones, too): What if the career path I choose isn’t what God has in mind for me?
The folly of this question lies in the misunderstanding that there is only one correct answer, and every other choice is wrong. In truth, God gives you options for how you want to spend the rest of your life and you could please him with any number of career paths, provided they are both legal and moral. Can’t decide between a career in nursing or accounting? No problem. God needs both.
Proverbs 16:3 says it right:
“Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.”
Pick something, do it wholeheartedly for Jesus, and be amazed at where he takes you!
Aim For the Right Bullseye: Jesus
What is the point of a college degree or high-paying career? Why are you even doing this? If your answer is happiness, fulfillment, or security, you’re aiming for the wrong bullseye. I want to be as happy, secure, and fulfilled as the next person but, ultimately, this earthly life is not about me and you.
It’s about Jesus.
Make your plans according to him. Pursue him with whatever you do, and you will be fulfilled. Live your life for him and watch him take you to amazing heights.
Keep your eye on the right bullseye.
Take Responsibility For Your Faith Today!
What you’ve learned in church and Sunday school as a child is deeply true, and that changes everything. As Joshua said in Joshua 24:15, “Choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”
You don’t have to have all the answers.
But, hey, why not?
Bring me your questions about faith, life, God, the Bible… and I’ll help you find the answers.
More Gospel-Centered Advice For Christian Graduates
I recommend the following books, both by Kevin DeYoung:
- Just Do Something: A Liberating Approach to Finding God’s Will
- Do Not Be True to Yourself: Countercultural Advice for the Rest of Your Life
More For Christian Teens Making the Transition to Adulthood:
- How to Live Independently With Total Dependence on God
- Transitioning to Adulthood: Advice For Christian Teens
- Life After High School: Just Pick Something And Do It!
