In all raw honesty, unbelievers are some of the most frustrating people to pray for. We’re talking long-term— years, or even decades—where you could be praying over and over for the same thing (faith) to come to the same person, and still see no results. When faced with this situation, there may come a time when you might stop and ask yourself, “Why should I keep praying for an unbelieving friend? What’s the point?”
Hi, I’m Lauren Thell, author of Christian YA fiction and blogger for teens who are ready to exceed the world’s expectations.
In This Article
A Turn for the Worse
I want to share with you a very personal story. If you read my post Sharing Your Faith: A Story of Hope After Failure, you already know I have a hit list of people I pray for every single day. You might call them “targets,” people whose hearts have yet to be “hit” by the Holy Spirit. Some are close family members, others are old friends and colleagues who I mostly just see on Facebook nowadays. But all of them have one thing in common:
They are all on the literal highway to hell. And I pray every day for God to open their eyes and change their hearts.
One such “target” is a former colleague, an intense musician with a sensitive heart and a great laugh. Several years ago, this target declared himself an atheist—and this after being raised in the Catholic faith. That’s how he ended up on my hit list. Since then, I’ve prayed every day for his heart to turn back to God. And I’ve been watching for signs of that change.
A sign came recently, but it wasn’t the sign I was looking for. What I saw demonstrated that not only had this friend NOT embraced faith again, but he’d moved even further from God. His heart hadn’t been touched by the Spirit at all.
Or so it would appear.
It made me want to give up, to rip his name from my list and move on. Why would God allow the opposite of what I prayed for to happen? This is something he wants too, for all people to become believers, so why? Why should I keep praying for my unbelieving friend?
God’s Response: “Don’t believe me? Just watch.”
Believe it or not, the answer didn’t come to me until I thought about what advice I would give to any one of my blog readers who might also be praying for an unbelieving friend and finding it’s not working. What does God have to say about that?
As long as the unbeliever is alive, there’s still time.
It’s not over yet. There’s still time. Watch me work.
This reminds me of when the Israelites were slaves in Egypt. God finally sent Moses, but Pharaoh didn’t let them go after just one plague. It took ten awful plagues, each one worse than the last, before the people were free. God does this a lot, actually. He allows things to get a little kooky before stepping in so that his glory might be displayed.
Therefore, as long as the unbeliever is alive, there’s still time.
You don’t have to have all the answers.
But, hey, why not?
Bring me your questions about faith, life, God, the Bible… and I’ll help you find the answers.
4 Things to Remember While Praying for An Unbelieving Friend
Here is a short list of things to keep in mind if you are praying for an unbelieving friend and not seeing results:
1) Your prayers are more powerful than you think.
The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.
James 5:16
God hears you and he listens to you because you are one of his own.
2) Your unbelieving friend needs you, a believer, to pray for him.
We know that God does not listen to sinners. He listens to the godly person who does his will.
John 9:31
Sometimes it really is all about who you know. You have an “in” with God, so you’re the one who can come to him in prayer.
3) You don’t know what’s happening in an unbeliever’s heart, but God does.
Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait until the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of the heart.
1 Corinthians 4:5
Your friend might appear to be a lost cause, but there could be a spark in her heart you can’t see, a tiny coal that isn’t completely certain of the path she’s chosen. Keep praying for it to be fanned into flames.
4) God works everything for good, and he uses you to do it.
For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose.
Philippians 2:13
Don’t give up, even if it means praying over and over for the same person until the day you die. Remember, you were once lost, too, and now you have been redeemed (Titus 3:3-7). God can work amazing things in a heart.
Prayers For Unbelievers
Struggling with finding the words to pray? There are no wrong words. But I get it, sometimes you want a script to help you get started. Here’s a little secret: Some portions of scripture make the perfect prayers for unbelievers with only a little tweaking of the pronouns. The following are prayers I created and use on a regular basis.
Prayer From Ephesians 1:17-19:
Lord God, glorious Father, give [name] the Spirit of wisdom and revelation so that [he/she] may know you better. I pray also that the eyes of [his/her] heart may be enlightened in order that [he/she] may know the hope to which you have called [him/her], the riches of your glorious inheritance in the saints, and your incomparably great power for us who believe.
Prayer From 1 Thessalonians 3:13:
Please strengthen [name]’s heart so that [he/she] will be blameless and holy in the presence of You, our God and Father, when our Lord Jesus comes with all his holy ones.
Prayer From Colossians 1:9-12:
Lord, I ask you to fill [name] with the knowledge of your will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives, so that [he/she] may live a life worthy of you and please you in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of you, being strengthened with all power according to your glorious might so that [he/she] may have great endurance and patience, and giving joyful thanks to you, who has qualified [him/her] to share in the inheritance of your holy people in the kingdom of light.
More Prayers For Unbelievers
Want to make up your own but not sure what to ask for? Check out Scriptural Prayers for Unbelievers from Pray3 for some starting points.
Don’t give up! Great things happen when believers pray.
Wow! Does this ever hit home! I am going to continue with my list. Thank you so much!
Great writings! We learned to never stop praying and never stop sharing because God always has the outcome in His hands.
Thank you for helping us of think about that, and thank you for sharing your experience.
I love the “hit list”. I think we all have them and I thank you for the reminder to be praying for them every day. God bless you, my friend.
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