“Dating is probably the most important aspect of a single person’s life.” -quote by Author Linda Sunshine
Whether or not you agree with Ms. Sunshine’s statement, no one can deny that single people have dating on the brain. Consider the number of books about dating, love, and romance on the market today. There are literally tons. But not all offer sound advice for Christians or teens.
Even smaller is the list of nonfiction books on dating for Christian teens specifically.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the choices, this post will come as a breath of cool air. I’ve compiled a list of fantastic books about dating, love, relationships—even marriage—all written with young Christians in mind. Looking for sound biblical advice? Check. Want something that addresses the specific issues of your age group? Check. Hoping for a book that isn’t a drag to read? Check.
It’s okay if dating is always on your mind. I’ve got you covered.
Hi, I’m Lauren Thell, author of Christian YA fiction and blogger for teens who are ready to exceed the world’s expectations.
In This Article
General Nonfiction Books On Dating for Christian Teens
Boundaries in Dating
by Henry Cloud & John Townsend
Despite what most people think when they see the title of this book, it’s not all about kissing and sex. Indeed, that issue is addressed, but seventeen other chapters go much deeper. This book touches on all boundaries in a dating relationship—emotional, spiritual, whether or not you should date a friend, etc.—preparing young people to make healthy choices that grow healthy relationships.
Consider it basic preparation for those who haven’t yet entered the field of dating, and a great field guide for those who have.
The Dirt on Dating
by Hayley DiMarco
For the teen who’s not interested in slogging through long dissertations, this is the quick-start guide to dating. At only 119 pages, this book doesn’t cover it all. And yet, it covers a lot of topics many other books on dating omit…like lessons in flirting.
Who would’ve thought?
Readers who don’t want to skim tons of narrative in search of practical tips will love the format of this book, which includes helpful highlighting, bullet points, and boxed material. As a bonus, The Dirt on Dating contains separate sections for guys and girls so you get gender-specific advice.
The 5 Love Languages
by Gary Chapman
Originally published in the early nineties, The 5 Love Languages continues to be a bestseller, topping Christian book lists year after year—because, like the Bible, the information it contains is timeless.
Boiled down to its most basic premise, The 5 Love Languages is all about seeing love as an action more than a feeling, and learning how to love someone using his or her own love “language.”
Ever wonder why your boyfriend is lukewarm about hugs and kisses but always begs you to go hiking with him? This book might answer that question. It doesn’t matter which version of The 5 Love Languages you pick up, whether it be the original or the singles edition. You’ll get the same information repackaged for a specific audience.
Nonfiction Books On Dating & Romance for Christian Girls
Ladies, you have lots of gender-specific choices when it comes to nonfiction books about dating for Christian teens! Here are just a few to get you started.
Love Defined
by Kristen Clark & Bethany Baird
Sisters Kristen Clark and Bethany Baird started a popular ministry known as Girl Defined to “help modern girls understand and live out God’s timeless truth for womanhood.” Their book helps young women bypass the cultural obsession with romance and seek satisfying, long-term love, laying out God’s original design for romance, covering topics like true love, purposeful relationships, boundaries, and glorifying God in every stage of your relationship.
For Young Women Only
by Shaunti Feldhahn & Lisa A. Rice
Ladies, you absolutely must read For Young Women Only. No, seriously.
If ever there existed a manual on teen guys, this is it. The authors went straight to the source with an in-depth survey completed by high school and college-age males, the results of which are shared with you in this fascinating read. Find out what “guys are visual” really means, how his physical desires affect you both, and what it is he wants most from you.
(Hint: It’s not love. Or sex.)
Thanks to this book, you no longer have to be clueless about what’s going on inside his head. The authors do warn you, however, to brace yourself. Some of it is hard to hear. But the real-life insight will help you make better, smarter decisions on how you interact with guys.
(And if you’re in a relationship, scroll down to see the version for young men, by Shaunti’s husband Jeff. You could always do what I did with my husband: Buy the guys’ edition, shove it into his hands, and let him study it on his own time. Just don’t expect a book report later. That’s not how guys process these things—something I learned from this book!)
One More for Christian Girls…
Confessions of a Boy-Crazy Girl: On Her Journey From Neediness to Freedom by Paula Hendricks. I haven’t read this one yet, but enough readers have raved about it that I feel compelled to include it in my own list of nonfiction books on dating & romance for Christian girls.
Nonfiction Books On Dating & Relationships for Christian Guys
If you haven’t noticed (in which case you’re probably living alone under a rock), guys and girls think differently. We have different strengths and struggles. These books speak directly to the heart of teen and twenty-something guys and the issues they face.
For Young Men Only: A Guy’s Guide to the Alien Gender
by Jeff Feldhahn et. al.
Yes, I know. A guy would rather drive thirty miles off course than stop and ask for directions. (FYI, women drive just as many extra miles because we struggle with sense of direction.) So you’re probably not inclined to pick up a book about girls when you could figure it out yourself.
But why spend twenty years looking for New York when you could get there in three days? That’s what For Young Men Only will help you do when it comes to understanding girls—how they think, what makes them feel cared for, what’s more important to them than anything else.
At the very least, you’ll learn how to talk to them without feeling like an idiot.
Love, Honor, and Virtue
by Hal & Melanie Young
You know what’s best about this book? It’s short! Bibliophiles aside, most guys don’t want to spend a lot of time in self-help books. They like the get in, get what you need, and get out approach, and this book does just that. It used to be you had to go looking for temptation. Now, it’s practically shoved into your hands, whether you want it or not. Young men are being exposed to and ensnared by things that didn’t exist when they were born.
Today, you have to fight for integrity.
Love, Honor, and Virtue is written for teens and twenty-something guys. In a world where gender is considered fluid, you’ll gain a biblical perspective on God’s biological and moral design for sex, build a solid foundation for Christ-honoring relationships, and find hope for recovery if you’ve stumbled.
When sin comes looking for you, it’s time to engage in the fight!
For Mature Readers: Nonfiction Books on Marriage For Christian Teens
Calling some of you mature is not to imply the rest are immature. Rather, I’m referring to those who are ready to go deeper, regardless of age or relationship status. You want the big picture, a deeper study of the destination of marriage and the ultimate final destination—eternity.
If that’s you, these books are for you.
These weren’t written specifically for teens, but I highly reccommend everyone read them sooner or later. Consider them “adult conversations” you’ve been invited to listen in on.
Sacred Marriage
by Gary Thomas
Popular thinking says two people should get married if it will make them happier. In Sacred Marriage, Gary Thomas flips that idea on its head by suggesting God designed marriage for the specific purpose of making us holy more than happy. (Though happiness and holiness go hand-in-hand.)
If you want to make better decisions in the how’s and what’s of dating, you need to understand the why of marriage. Go beyond happily ever after with holier ever after.
The Meaning of Marriage
by Timothy Keller
Do you believe everyone has a “soul mate”? That romance is the most important key to a successful marriage, and divorce is okay in some cases? Why marry at all?
In The Meaning of Marriage, Tim Keller and his wife Kathy draw a parallel between marriage and God’s relationship with man using the famous biblical passage on marriage in Ephesians 5. I recommend it for singles as well as married couples because keeping the main objective in mind will help you make wise decisions during your dating years.
Nonfiction Books on Sex & Gender Issues
Check out my list of Shameless Nonfiction Books On Sex & Gender For Christian Teens.
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Happy reading!
Get Your Christian Dating Questions Answered!
Check out my popular post The Ultimate Teen’s Guide to Christian Dating where I answer your top questions about everything from boundaries to biblical principles in Christian dating.