In my last post, Be Grateful, Not Entitled: Serve Without Expecting Thanks, I encouraged Christian teens to adopt an attitude of selfless service, the kind that doesn’t require constant back-patting. You should always serve without expecting thanks in return. So this post might seem like a complete reversal of my own advice, but now I’m going to tell you that you should always say thank you to everyone who serves you.
I don’t just mean thanking someone for something outstanding—like gifting you a car, paying your college tuition, or saving you from a stampeding herd of cattle. Thanks is due in all situations, from the smallest act of kindness to the people whose service you’ve come to expect like clockwork. But why is it important to always say thank you, and what are some unique ways you can do it?
Hi, I’m Lauren Thell, author of Christian YA fiction and blogger for teens who are ready to exceed the world’s expectations.
In This Article
4 Reasons Why You Should Always Say Thank You
Consider how an attitude of selfless service is companion to the attitude of gratitude:
1) Saying thanks at the bottom helps you say thanks at the top.
“Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”
1 Thessalonians 5:18
God not only wants you to have a thankful heart, he commands it in this verse. He wants you to recognize the blessings he has given you, from the small to the large, because he knows a thankful heart is a healthy and happy heart. But it’s more difficult to be appreciative of God’s greatest gift (namely, Christ’s sacrifice) if you’re not even thankful for the little things people do for you everyday. No act of service is too small to be recognized.
Related: 7 Tremendous Truths Christian Teens Can Thank God For
2) Showing your appreciation builds others up.
“And we urge you…encourage the disheartened...”
1 Thessalonians 5:14
It’s hard to do a thankless job, and while you should always serve without expecting a reward, not receiving any appreciation at all can be disheartening for those who serve you.
Are you still living at home? When was the last time you thanked your mother (or whoever else fills this role) for cooking you a meal, washing your clothes, and serving you chicken soup when you’re sick? Have you ever thanked your coach or teachers for sharing their knowledge, or your coworkers for doing their part? What about the janitor who cleans the bathrooms?
If you’re still having trouble finding an attitude of gratitude, just imagine what your life would be like if all those people disappeared.
3) Appreciation strengthens relationships.
Every relationship you have—whether with your coworkers, classmates, friends, siblings, parents, or girlfriend or boyfriend—will grow if you continually show your appreciation for the other person. Just feeling thankful in your heart is not enough, you need to always say thank you out loud.
This doesn’t just benefit the other party in your relationship. Research done by Harvard shows that couples who regularly express gratitude for each other have a greater connection and bond. (It’s that whole oxytocin “love hormone” thing.)
4) Saying thank you gets you better service.
I’ve put this last because this should be the last reason you should always say thank you, but it is a truism. I’ve worked in the service industry as a waitress, a store clerk, a housekeeper, and a bank teller (not all at once), and I can honestly verify you will get better service if you are kind and appreciative.
(That doesn’t mean that I didn’t serve my grumpy, demanding customers well. But the ones who treated me well and said thank you got a more personalized experience, and always with a smile.)
It’s okay to enjoy the benefits of an attitude of gratitude.
Different Ways to Say Thank You
When you have a thankful heart, you have to express it, right? Change it up by trying all of these.
- Just say thanks! Sometimes that’s all it takes to make someone’s day.
- Write a thank-you note. A note takes a little more thought than a verbal thanks and shows you really mean it.
- Pay a compliment. Compliments not only show appreciation but also make it clear that you notice someone and his/her strengths. Just be sure it’s sincere.
- Give a gift. Consider giving your teachers, your bus driver, your mail carrier, even the UPS driver who frequents your house, a token of appreciation. Buy your mother flowers just to show your appreciation for her, do an extra chore to say thanks to your dad for the things he does for you. A gift can also be taking a friend out for malts and paying for hers.
- Do something they enjoy. Quality time is one of the five recognized love languages so if you want to express your gratitude to someone, so a little love by setting aside time for him or her!
- Acknowledge that person publicly. The next time you sit down with your family for supper, announce that you really appreciated your brother doing your chores for you when you were sick. To thank someone in a more public setting, consider writing a letter to the editor of your local newspaper.
- Return the favor. Find a way to serve the one who served you.
- Pay it forward. Suppose someone does something for you in anonymity, and now you can’t thank him or her. Show the same kindness to someone else.
- Pray. Thank God in all circumstances.
A show of appreciation should not be reserved for special occasions. Always say thank you, and do it happily!
More on Gratitude & Having a Thankful Heart
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Check out these other posts that will encourage your attitude of gratitude!